A 2012 online study showed that couples who experience healthy conflict are 10 times more likely to be in a happy relationship than those who ignore difficult conversations. So fighting with your partner can have many benefits for your relationship, as long as you and your loved one do it in a loving and constructive way.
We understand that arguing is quite common, and that is why we have prepared a list of techniques to follow to do it better.
How To Keep A Relationship Strong And Happy
Make Your Criticism Constructive
Criticism is a normal part of a relationship as the person in front of you may have many flaws and unacceptable behavior. However, when you express your frustrations with strong verbal attacks, you take away your partner’s self-esteem and create an emotional distance between the two of you.
Instead, communicate in a friendly way, focusing on the behavior itself rather than the person in front of you. One technique you can use here is the confrontation sandwich: throw a few words of praise and encouragement at your partner at the beginning and end of the criticism.
Be Mindful Of Your Emotions
Arguments are difficult, and if we don’t learn to control our emotions in difficult times, we can go down a destructive path. On the other hand, we can learn to control our emotions and stay present and aware in the most intense moments, which is why meditation is highly praised among relationship experts.
Call A Timeout If You Or Your Partner Needs One
Things can quickly escalate in the middle of an argument and sometimes one of you can reach a boiling point which can lead to name-calling, insults, or even violence. In that case, it’s best to walk away from the discussion to calm down and get back to actual conflict resolution.
Experts say that the waiting time should not exceed 24 hours, otherwise it will be swept under the rug.
Mirror Each Other’s Body Language
Mirroring someone refers to the act of adopting the person’s posture, gestures, and words. According to psychological research, this behavior is a sign of a strong connection, because mirroring someone helps us get a better idea of what the other is experiencing from their perspective.
When this happens, you both feel a form of empathy, comfort, and trust in each other.
Remember That You Are On The Same Team
When you make the decision to be with someone, you put your ego aside when solving problems, which means you don’t focus on who’s right and who’s wrong, but you both work to solve the problem together.
Everything is better when you recognize that they are partners and not enemies.
Set Mutual Rules For Your Arguments
After a few fights, we began to learn to understand each other and respect each other’s limits. For example, your partner may not like being interrupted or walking away in the middle of an argument, and you hate being constantly blamed.
Next time, the two of you will avoid these harmful behaviors and make rules about how you want to discuss things.
Do you have another technique to add to this list? We’d love to hear about it in the comments!
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